Squawk Radio

Sunday, January 29, 2006

A Delicate Matter


A little “situation” has arisen here on the home front. It’s a delicate matter. Nothing life threatening, nothing earth-shattering, just one of those little social problems that crop up now and again which need to be handled with a bit more tact or deceitfulness or subterfuge or honesty or something that I don’t have enough of. So, of course, I brought this problem to the attention of the squawkers who, after much discussion and head-scratching and failure to reach a quorum, decided to dump it in your collective laps, suggesting, “Why don’t you ask the people on our blog?”

So, for your consideration

THE SQUAWK CRISIS DU JOUR

Here’s the situation: I have a friend who has a wonderful male friend who has been widowed for three years (and before you roll your eyes and say, “oh, sure, Connie!” honest! This really isn’t about anyone I know. I would SO get busted if I wrote about someone publicly! It’s my fate: "Connie must Never Get Away with Anything." And becasue I am so paranoid-- I have manipulated the story a bit!) Anyway, this guy's allegedly a real sweetheart, an intelligent, down-to-earth gentleman, soft-spoken, well-mannered and, looks-wise, pretty conservative.

This friend also has a female friend who she’s known since college who is kind, smart, generous and fun. Even better her two friends share many of the same values and interests and likes. Of course, my friend thinks they should date!

"So what’s the problem, Connie?"

My friend’s female friend. While at work she dresses in a refined, even elegant, manner but when she get ready for a date her body is suddenly possessed by the spirit of a Britney Spears wannabe which freaks my friend out. Because "Being Britney" might be okay if you're 24—but she’s 48. She apparently plies on heavy, neon blue eye make-up with a trowel and wears her daughter’s spangled tube top. (No, I didn’t ask how much she weighs. Want to...didn’t. One of the few times discretion won. Yeah, me!)

Now, my friend claims these two belong together, but they don’t stand a chance because of that all important first impression. She is afraid her male friend would take one look at her female friend and go into mental lock-down. And this is sad and unhappy because her girlfriend’s "date appearance" doesn't represent who she is at all.

So, the question she posed me, and which I posed the squawkers, and which we now in turn pose you, is this: What’d ya do?! Do you say something to the woman? How? Do you fix up the blind date and say something to the man beforehand? Do you fix up a blind date and say nothing? Do you forget the whole thing? Is there another option?

My steno pad at ready. Teach me, Obi Wan(s). You’re their only hope!
Connie Brockway, 10:26 PM
34 comments